With One Last Breath
Shadow of Screams
"As a great woman once said, 'She, the female, needs no man to be her pillar, but herself.' I completely agree and disagree with her. For without love, she has nothing to live for, and without a man she has freedom. A paradox is love, really."
-Coloured Rose ('88-?)
Bulma hummed to the radio, feeling happy. She chopped up vegetables and skimmed the meat as she put them in the pot of boiling water. Today was a special day. That's right. It was hers and Vegeta's anniversary of when they got together.
"Hmm.." She hummed thoughtfully, as she stirred the almost-ready stew. They had been together for what, twenty some years now? Bra was only three and Trunks was what was it now? Ah, yes, only 14. Time had went by faster than she thought possible. That thought made her smile. Despite all that she and Vegeta had went through, she still loved him. The question was, did he love her? She knew he had to, though he never said it.
'Tonight he will.' Bulma said to herself. Trunks and Bra were at Chichi's house thankfully, to give her and her husband a night of privacy, at least.
Act all happy
Pretend everything is okay
Just the way
You hoped it to be
But then it's shattered
To a million bits
I guess, you see
It wasn't really meant to be
Bulma waited by the table all dressed up, in her pretty dark-red dress that screamed wild lust and temptation that reached her calves, slight slits up the leg, letting everyone who could come in right now the creamy smooth skin. Her face was scrubbed clean, then the pores covered in a gentle caressing nature of make-up to cover every imagined flaw. Her hair had been brushed and cared for carefully, making it look and feel silky, as she had a way of knowing Vegeta would want to feel her hair during their lovemaking. Bulma waited there in her lace-up sandals, thinking of what a great night it would be. Love, passion, and wild sex would be greatly anticipated.
She had thought of putting candles on the table, yet knowing him he'd probably blast them off for fun. There was a nice blood red tablecloth and a cascade of food on the table, all just for her mate.
He came from training, all sweaty and tired, and sat down in a chair, glancing once at her, before grunting and getting to his meal. Bulma could have sworn she caught a glimpse of lust in his onyx black eyes, if it weren't for his next words.
"Why are you dressed like that!?" He barked as he stuck his fork angrily into his meal, "And where are the brats?" Vegeta asked between mouthfuls. Bulma felt a pang of disappointment at her heart, but hid it skillfully. No, things might be rough now, but they'll get better.., she promised herself.
"Bra and Trunks are at the Sons'... I-I thought we might need this night alone."
"Feh. What for? And you still haven't answered my question about how your dressed so.. so.. whorishly."
"It's our anniversary, baka." She said hardly, trying to disguise the pain in her. Did he really think this dress was sluttish? Usually he liked dresses like these!.. maybe he was just angry from training, afterall, they hadn't made love for a week now.. maybe he's just tense. She even attempted a smile and a flirtatious wink. Vegeta smirked and arched a thick eyebrow.
"Anniversary of what? The day those brats were born?," He paused after a bite, "no, that's birthday." Vegeta said as he thought more. He finished his meal, finally glad that the woman cooked decently for once.
"Our Anniversary. Ours. Today is the anniversary of when we first got together." Bulma said, determined to not show the hurt he was giving her. How could he not remember?.. no Bulma. Pull yourself together. Stay focused. Focused. She thought to herself. Remember, don't overreact.. just enjoy the evening. She went behind him and put her hands on his shoulders, determined to make him relax.
"Feh. How can you cherish such moments like that?" He slightly moaned, as she worked the kinks out of his shoulder-muscles. Vegeta furrowed his eyebrow. Oh gods.. it felt so good.. then his eyes snapped open. The bond. No, he had to stop this right now before it got too intimate.
"Because they're special to me.. because I love-" She stopped his masseuse as he cut her off.
"..what..? Me? Oh, yes. Really woman, I don't want to deal with this now." He got up. He had to get away from her. Now.
"..Wha-what do you mean?.." Bulma asked feeling tears spring to her eyes. Vegeta coldly gazed at her. It can't be true. It just can't! But...but it was, wasn't it?
But then it's shattered
To a million bits
Not meant to be
"Love is just a weak emotion. I will not be weak like you or those pathetic earthlings or even Kakarott.." Vegeta sneered at the last part. He looked away, not wanting to meet her eyes. How could he get her to understand? No, he had to push her away so she wouldn't get hurt.
"But-but what about-"
He cut her off. "We may be living together, have a son and daughter together, share the same bed, but what makes you think that I love you? Feh...For someone so smart, you are incredibly stupid." He winced inwardly at the words. He wondered how long he would be sleeping on the sofa for that remark. No, he had to make her realize so she wouldn't get hurt.
Suddenly angry, Bulma's temper snapped. "Well, I shouldn't have expected it from someone like you," Vegeta glared at her from his spot from the table. She stayed at her place by the counter.
"What do you mean, someone like me?!" Anger started seeping its brutal way into his blood.
"Someone with no actual clue about love. I bet-"
Vegeta growled, cutting her off. "You bet what?"
Her features softened for a minute. "Vegeta, please let's not fight these games.. let just enjoy the evening while we can and forget-"
"Forget what? A few petty insults? A few proclamations of undying love?" A sneer. "Come on, I want to know what you were going to say, Bulma." Sarcasm.
Bulma growled, the patience unraveling. How could she make him understand? "Dammit, just let it go, Vegeta. Finish your dinner and-"
"Don't tell me what to do!" True anger was flowing through him now. How dare she just order him around and without an answer to his question.
"I can damn right tell you what to do. Let's just enjoy the fucking meal before it gets cold!"
"NO!" The sharp clatter of the silverware connecting to the floor fell on deaf ears. "I want to know what you were going to say, Bulma. Huh? What were you going to say. Tell me." A command, not a request. Bulma bristled.
"FINE! YOU WOULDN'T KNOW LOVE IF IT BIT YOU IN THE ASS!" Bulma growled. "I hate it that you shut me out every Kami-damned time I try to get close. All I want to know is you, and your past-"
"Woman, forget it! The past is too dangerous to venture back. Besides what would a stupid Chikyuujin ningen want to know about me?"
Bulma's mouth activated before her mind. "Well, at least I wasn't Frieza's little lap dog!" She spat at him, then covered her mouth with her palm, realizing too late as the words flew out of her lips.
Before she could even blink, the blur named "Vegeta" had come close to her and pressed her against the refrigerator, hand tightening around her throat.
"Never, NEVER, mention that bastard's name in front of my presence." He hissed at her, noses touching, eyes filled with rage and anger. It didn't even seem like him. Blood was beginning to cover the edges, and for a moment Bulma saw the insanity's sharp edge embedded in his soul. It flew by, very brief (no pun intended, mind you). It ruffled through the onyx, making it shine with bloodlust. The animal inside him. It zoomed away with a shadow of screams.
Bulma gasped for not only air but from the exhilaration of seeing such an intimate yet dangerous part of Vegeta, a part she had never encountered before. hair turning red then a slight purple color from lack of air. Vegeta noticed and let his grip loosen considerably, but still had his hand still clamped, albeit almost-gentle, around her throat. It had scared her when he had his hands gripped around her neck, but had almost caused her to faint from fright at the loose hand encasing her delicate neck; to know that he wasn't tightening his grip on her.
Bulma could only nod, and met with Vegeta's gaze. She felt her fear fade and slowly a strange unknown feeling took it's place inside Bulma.
He leaned in and whispered softly to her, the anger getting the better of him. "Make note of this Onna. I will not harm you, for you are my mate and the mother of my children, but that is the only reason why I did not strike you down, wench. I do not know the feelings of love of which you speak of, and furthermore, don't bring up the past. Forget this and your foolish notion of love. Forget your hope, because I won't love you back."
With that said, Vegeta went out to train again (to him, so he wouldn't be tempted to get out of control and hurt her; to Bulma, because he was disgusted with her), leaving Bulma alone.
The blue-haired woman stared disbelievingly, crumbled at the floor, sobbing, as he went out. She had cooked all this food, dressed so beautifully, spoken her true feelings.. and for what? Nothing.. no love, a wound to her heart.
A wound too many for her.
She got up and shakily took a sip of her wine, before angrily wrenching it away, enjoying the shatter of glass against the wall. Burgundy liquid presented a beautiful purple contrast from the white.
Bulma thought Vegeta had changed, had done something better, had finally learned to love.
But she was wrong.
She shoved a small table to the ground. Dishes. More glasses. Each sound of destruction was music to her ears. She didn't care if she were cut, just wanted other things to shatter, break, die. The table clothe went next, rumpled down on the floor as she stomped it with her sandal.
Everything ruined.. then the part of her wondered on Vegeta's eyes. What exactly had she seen? Madness, no doubt. Madness she was desperate to heal. But he wouldn't let her, dammit!
Wouldn't. No matter how hard she tried.
Getting up and going outside, tears swimming, she took out her capsule to her car. She just wanted to get away. Sometimes you just couldn't take it. 'I need to go out for a drive.' Tears coursed down her cheeks, marring her makeup.
Sometimes you have to get away
From it all
Get in the car
It's your call
throw away the chain and ball
Saw it all
thrown around like a little toydoll
Vegeta kicked his imaginary opponent. Why was he feeling this? Hurting the woman wasn't supposed to affect him. It wasn't. He was only supposed to protect her. From himself and his demons. Then why did he feel so.. so guilty when he heard her cries? He may have bonded to the woman, but he did not love her. Never.
Grumbling angrily, he felt his mate's ki get farther and farther away from Capsule Corp. and himself. Narrowing his eyes, he shook it off.
'Probably went off to wail to Kakarott's mate about how I didn't love her back.' Vegeta chuckled darkly, though a slight stinging sensation in his eyes. Somehow the words hurt him, that he didn't love her back. He shook it off and gave a one-two-three-four punch to his shadow. A sense of dread knotted in his stomach. Something bad was going to happen. Shrugging it off once more, he went inside to finish the remains of his dinner. As long as she was safe.
Even as Vegeta had thought that he couldn't relieve the pain. The feeling stayed with him all the way through the night. Little did he know, she was far from safe. And that he, and others before him, all anonymous and pale with Life's weariness that corroded their lives, would join him.
They would all unraveling each of their stories, sharing unknowingly, all dark and mysterious, and bitter as unripe fruit. That they were involved in a much deeper way than being the same race and ability to think.
And Vegeta would find out that his own sanity was a thin thread, threatening to cut at anytime. Just ready to snap.
But you can't help but feel
A little bit scared
When your soul was almost bared
And now she's gone
She sped away in her car, feeling addicted to the speed. Nevermind the rain, nevermind the hurricane approaching, nevermind that it was dangerous to combine such dangerous elements with the dark and going at such a fast rate. She didn't care anymore. He didn't care for her. What reason was there to live?
Her children. That thought made her speed down a couple notches, but not enough.
Her children.. that was a reason to live. She could always have the love from her children ... but it wasn't enough. She wanted Vegeta to love her, damn it all.
What to hope for now? Afterall this time, she was fed up with it. She had to get away for a while.
She'd return soon..maybe. When she was feeling better.
Forget this and your foolish notion of love. Forget your hope, because I won't love you back.. Vegeta's words echoed in her head.
Won't. Not can't.
Won't. He wouldn't love her back.
Bulma let an angry sob escape her bruised throat. Not to have hope. That hurt. Vegeta hadn't wounded her pride (maybe a little), but her hope. Hope for him someday, not today or next week, but someday loving her back. But even Vegeta didn't see it like that.
Tears blurred her vision. She couldn't see the road. It was dangerous being on a cliff road, where many things could go wrong. But Bulma didn't listen to common sense. She just wanted to get away. She couldn't take it. Bulma thought yet again on Vegeta's eyes ... she couldn't help but close her eyes and give a shudder. Such untamed wilderness in his mind. She opened her eyes and looked at the mirror, amazed at the mascara smeared, blotchy face that looked back at her. Honking of a truck violently slammed into her conscious and her attention turned to the road again.
Suddenly headlights blinded her and the honking of a big truck. What the? Bulma thought. She lost control of the wheel, and all the blue-haired woman could remember next was flying into the air before landing with a loud splash. Upon impact with the water, Bulma knocked her head against the steering wheel and caused a bloodwound to come to on her forehead.
'..Ve..Vegeta..' She thought weakly as she slipped out of consciousness. She felt cool liquid envelope her and after that everything became blank.
Bulma would have everlasting dreams after that. No pain, no suffering.
Just to sleep, encased in her own sleepy, ocean tomb.
Now she's gone,
From your little life
Never sing that song
she sung that day
Never to smile and look at you that way
Never to be hopelessly in love
Oh, why, Why didn't she stay?
"Bulma!" Vegeta gasped out as he woke up. The sun was bright and shining, birds were chirping. He growled. How he hated cheerful mornings. He shook his head of hearing Bulma gasp out his name. It was just a dream. Just a dream.
Yeah, keep telling yourself
It was just a dream
Still breathing heavily, he got up and dressed. Going downstairs, he noticed neither the brats or the Onna was there. He blinked, but calmed himself down. Relax, the Onna said that the brats were over at a friend's house, which I can naturally assume is Kakarott's. The Onna is probably there with them, eating breakfast. Feh. Always leaving me to do everything. I'll just go over there and give her a piece of my mind, and take some food as well. Vegeta smirked at the thought. His mind unwillingly went back to last night.
She didn't have to leave. Vegeta frowned, but then he looked at his hands, narrowing his eyes. He hadn't hurt her in his desperate escape to get out of there, had he? Vegeta hoped not. The bond. He searched around, feeling for her faint presence in his mind. Strangely, he couldn't feel her. Then he smirked. She was probably too far away. He got up, eager to see her again. Seeing her in that dress sent his loins on fire, and the desire for her had only increased overnight. If only the matters of the bond hadn't interrupted him, he would have taken her then and there. And then there was that little arguement. Vegeta narrowed his eyes and smirked. He would have to teach the naughty woman a lesson tonight. Yes, tonight ... tonight he would have her.
No interruptions from the "bond business."
When you yelled
It wasn't real
It wasn't true
Just a lie
To forget all about you
When he arrived, he saw Trunks sparring with Goten, and Bra and Pan talking animatedly, playing. Gohan was referring the spar, occasionally giving fighting tips and Videl was talking with Chichi, both sitting in chairs. Trunks turned and saw his father, completely surprised. Goku was just eating his heart out (tee hee with food, of course!).
"Dad, what are you doing here?"
"I'm here for your mother. Where's the Onna, mate of Kakarott?" Vegeta asked Chichi, rather rudely.
Chichi, a bit miffed, answered back, "BULMA isn't here, Vegeta," using a spiteful tone at Vegeta's name.
"Daddy!" Bra yelled happily, as she got up and ran to him as much as her small legs would allow her to. "Mommy's not here, but you can stay and play with me." Bra spoke up as she greeted her father affectionally hugging his legs. Pan glared at Vegeta, who dared to interrupt 'play time.'
Vegeta's eyes widened, ignoring his daughter's attentions. Where was his mate?
"Dad..?" Trunks questioned, not liking the silence from his father. Goku stopped eating, and looked concerned. Chichi and Videl, as well as Gohan and Goten looked on solemnly, worried. Something didn't feel right.
"I thought your mother came here last night.."
"Vegeta, are you sure.? Maybe Bulma told you something else-"
"She didn't tell me anything, Kakarott. She ran out and went for a ride in that silly contraption of hers last night. I haven't heard from her since."
There was a silence. One that hurt everyone's ears. Bra and Pan didn't understand, but knew something bad had happened.
'Where's mommy..?' Bra asked her father silently, knowing he wouldn't hear her.
Where did mommy go
Where'd she run off to?
You just cried
And shook your head
"I don't know"
"Why would Kaasan run out?" Trunks asked, feeling suddenly worried for his mother. What had happened? Trunks felt a stirring in his mind, a deep nagging that something should be checked out. That something was being hidden, concealed. There was something about his father eyes...
"I don't know, brat." Vegeta looked away, the unwilling memory of his hands tightening over her throat. No matter what he did, he hurt her! Trunks arched an eyebrow, knowing that his father was hiding something, but didn't ask further.
"Don't worry Vegeta. She probably just went off somewhere to blow off steam. She'll come back and everything will be okay." Goku said, trying to make everyone feel better, but looked to the sky, unsure. Vegeta felt the knot in his stomach intensify with each passing second.
"In the mean time, why don't you relax here?" Goku turned and had that cheerful look that Vegeta hated so much, but somehow it managed to calm Vegeta's frazzled nerves, if only a little. The pain in his stomach still was there; he dismissed it for hunger.
Vegeta didn't argue this time, but kept his hard, scowled look. "Fine, Kakarott."
"Kenji!" A girl, around eight or so, yelled to her older brother, who was washing shellfish on the Isle shore. Kenji, a man of twenty-some years, brushed his unruly brown hair as he stared as his little sister waving frantically, running towards him.
"What is it, Shishomi?" Kenji chuckled at the red face of Shishomi, as he continued to bathe the shells free from dirt and residue. Shishomi put her hands on her overall-covered hips and wiped her sweat-drenched forehead with the back of her hand, and brushed aside bothersome black bangs behind her ears.
"You won't believe what I found on the beach!"
* * * * *
Preview of next chapter:
Damn you woman. Where are you? And why am I so concerned about you? This is all your fault. If only you just stayed at home and whined at me, instead of leaving. Vegeta thought angrily, but kept his face impassive on the outside, as he stared at his now-empty plate. Chichi, commanded from a look from Goku, filled it back up, and Vegeta ate, like a robot almost.
Goku, on the other hand, couldn't shake off the feeling something very wrong happened with Bulma and it had to do with Vegeta and last night.
Review please! ^-^ Otherwise I won't know whether to continue or not..